Don’t Call Me, I’ll Call You

Would you like to take part in a Survey? An Opinion Poll? Qualify for a trip? Sign up for our low interest credit card? No problem, just answer these few questions and you can do these things from the comfort of your dining room table. Every evening thousands of Canadians are called on the telephone and given all of these options and more, from companies that mine lists for contact information in an attempt to get you to buy into something.

Recently in Canada the CRTC developed the national Do Not Call List. By signing on to this list Canadians were supposed to reduce the number of calls from these companies and get some peace from the high pressure sales tactics. Now it turns out that, perhaps, this list does not work as well as we were led to believe it might. Aside from a half dozen or so exceptions, this list was supposed to make it illegal for companies to make unsolicited contact with you at your home phone number. Stiff fines were set up and all was to be right with the world. Nope. Turns out that many Canadians have seen an increase in the number of unwanted calls they are getting. Kind of frustrating, to say the least. Apparently, the concept of Do Not Call was too tough for the CRTC to understand.

Can there be that many people out there who do business with these companies to make it worth the effort? How many people are signing up for credit cards over the phone? Do you really believe that you have won a trip to the Bahamas, without having bought a ticket or entered a draw? How many people spend 5, 10 or 15 minutes of their time answering surveys on the phone? Who is making these companies believe that there is money to be made making these calls? There has to be someone. Companies don't spend money without the expectation of making more money.

I have heard of several funny ways to screw with the telemarketers who call. There was one guy who came up with dozens of scripts for all kinds of occasions. In one, he pretended to be panicked and very relieved that the carpet cleaning company called, because he had blood in the carpet and on the furniture and had to get it out 'right now'. Or the Jerry Seinfeld line about this not being a good time but could he call the telemarketer later at home. Then there are those who ask as many questions as they can think of in the hopes of frustrating the caller. And then there are those who just hang up when these people call.

It must be a terrible job to have, to call people all day and have the phone slammed down or be sworn at over and over again. Do call centers have a role in our society? Sure. I have no problem with inbound call centers. You know tech support. Credit card customer service. Things like that. Where I am the one to initiate the call in order to access a service. In an increasingly technological and fast paced world, these places do serve a purpose.

But when it comes to companies who interrupt my dinner or time I intend to spend with my family… Well, we should all tell them the same thing—'Don't call me, I'll call you'.