I’m There But Not There

I try to be an involved parent. I think it's a good thing when parents can take part in their children's activities. I think if a parent can manage to show an interest in their child's development it helps the child to feel important and builds confidence for the future. In the last few years as my children have begun to get older and take interest in different activities, my wife and I are travelling to more and more events, activities, recitals and locations, in an effort to support our children and stay involved. Some of these activities, we can take part in as coaches or 'support staff' but for some things we are just proud members of the audience, and as such we do the things that proud parents do. We wait expectantly for our child to take centre stage. Fire off enough pictures to fill a museum. Clap like idiots for the performance our child just finished, and nod and compliment other parents in the same boat as we are in.

All of this can be fun, nerve racking and embarrassing, sometimes all at once. But I find that my digital video camera gets in the way. I spend time making sure that my child is in the centre of the frame. I follow the action with the camera trying to keep it steady so that future viewers don't have to take motion sickness pills before they watch. I fight with other parents for the perfect spot to take my video. All of this means that even though I am in attendance at the event I'm not really there. I don't get to actually 'see' my children perform, except through the LCD screen on the camera.

Yes, I know, we want to be able to go back and see how our kids danced, or sang, or played in later years. Yes, it's great for the grandparents and aunts and uncles who could not attend to be able to see the performance. But why? Until the advent of the still camera and later video, events happened. People watched and remembered the performance. If someone missed the performance, too bad. It was described to them and life went on. When did this need to record everything become so ingrained in society.

I think from now on I am going to 'forget' the camera at home. At least for a while. I think that I will attend the events and enjoy what is happening, while it happens, instead of watching it when I get home. And if someone can't make it to the show, maybe I'll do a puppet show for them later.